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One of the dafter ideas I have had in recent times is to propose a staff show to raise funds for the Red Cross. I had rather naively thought that we might get a few volunteers to come up with some acts but it seems that volunteers are thin on the ground. Nevertheless we soldiered on and put something together. My friend Dave Cale took on the music and the staff band was awesome. Apart from music the rest of the show consisted of me doing some standup.

This is not the first time I have had a crack at standup but the scarcity of other acts meant I had to do quite a lot of it – over an hour!

Thankfully it seemed to go OK and people had a good night.

For the hell of it I have included a short extract from the comedy script. The following lines are part of a dialogue between me and the priest that takes place in the confession box. I had just admitted to all kinds of inappropriate sexual fantasies involving the women in the parish.

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The weather forecast for yesterday stated that there was a 100% chance of rain, which is a pretty lousy forecast in most peoples´ books. Of course, if you wanted rain this would have been about as good a forecast as you could possibly hope for.

Personally I don´t mind the rain one bit. I´m Irish, which means that an occasional drenching is part of my cultural heritage, like drinking Guinness. So yesterday I headed off to the river knowing that I had a pretty good chance of getting soaked but it was not so much how the rain might affect me that I was thinking about, but how it would affect the river and, indirectly, the fish. View full article »

Recently I got a message from another fisherman, Dave Felce, who also likes to fish for carp on the fly. Dave lives in the UK but is an occasional visitor to Spain and likes to wet a line in Extremadura whenever he can. He was kind enough to say that he enjoyed what I had written on the subject in my book and that he has a perspective on the subject of fly fishing for carp that is very similar to my own.

He included with his message an excellent article he had written on the subject and was kind enough to let me reproduce it here:

 

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I had a very fine fish on the Río Grande this afternoon. I was delighted with it, not only because it was a beautiful fish, but because I had my work cut out to catch it.

The Grande is a little coloured now following recent rain but I thought that the extra water it was carrying might encourage the fish to spread out a little and explore the reaches upstream of the deeper pools which are off limits when the river is skinnier. View full article »

On Tuesday I spent a little while playing with plastic building blocks with a delightful young lady in Tangiers. There were about eight of us sitting around a little table building all manner of temporary structures from colourful blocks, or, in our case dismantling them. As it happens we soon discovered that our own particular aptitude was for demolition. The young lady in question would pull apart the two block structure I had assembled and then make a spectacular facial expression to indicate wonder or awe or surprise. I would mirror the expression in turn and we both spent quite a while fully immersed in this little game: assembling, dismantling and then expressing complete astonishment.

The young lady in question has Down syndrome just like all the other children in her school and I was part of a visiting group from the school where I teach. There were 25 of us in all, two teachers and 23 of our sixth form students including my daughter, Pippa. View full article »

My ancient car is acting up. On Monday morning it refused to start which was curious because the previous day it had taken me happily to the river and back. Maybe it was just drawing the line, as I am often tempted to do, at heading off for another week at work at some ungodly hour in the morning.

And then yesterday it failed, in spectacular fashion, its annual technical inspection. It often lets itself down on some little technical defect or other but yesterday it decided to pull out all the stops and fail with aplomb. The man with the torch who lives in a dark cave and inspects the underneath of the cars was so impressed by the defects that he surfaced into daylight and asked me to go down with him to look up. He said “look, see that broken bit?” and pointed to a broken bit and then he said “look, see that crack?” and pointed to a crack. I pretended to be surprised but knew perfectly well that the whole car was just more or less hanging together. View full article »

I had a simple plan for this afternoon. First I was going to head off to the Guadalhorce to see if I could fool a few fish with some simple nymphs I tied up yesterday afternoon. After that I was going to drop in to Café Europa for a cafe con leche.

There is nothing much to the little nymphs I use. I tie them on smallish (size 14) barbless grub hooks and they seem quite palatable to the barbel and carp. You could do a lot of fooling around trying different patterns but I tend not to. I have a lot of confidence in these things and stick to them out of a mixture of laziness and brand loyalty. View full article »

You can´t be in two places at once. This is a shame because this evening there were two places I desperately wanted to be. One was the river bank, which will come as no surprise, and the other was in front of some screen showing Ireland playing Romania in the rugby world cup.

In the end I managed a bit of each. I had planned on watching the whole rugby match but could only do so on a computer and was frustrated by the streaming. One minute the players were flat out running, or tackling, or trying to kill each other and then the next they would all just freeze in every imaginable contortion until they would suddenly come to life again. Despite the frustrations of seeing a match unfold in this way I stuck it out until Ireland had a healthy lead and I felt they were safe to continue in my absence without the instruction that I provide. View full article »

Last week I met up with three visiting fishermen and, on Sunday, we spent a few hours on the river before going to take a look at Concepción Reservoir. I had been lucky enough to meet Simon Thompson pretty recently at the CLA game fair in Leeds. Simon is another blogger and has a great blog which, if you have not seen it already, is well worth a visit. You can reach it (I hope) by clicking on this link: http://has2btheflyway.com

Though Simon and I were no strangers to this river (we had spent an afternoon on the Guadalhorce last year) it was the first visit for the other two members of the fishing party, Simon´s brother Stuart and Jonathon, who is Simon´s long-time fishing buddy.

The boys were all set up for a week´s fishing but they seem to have been plagued with bad luck from the outset. To start off with, the heavens opened up early in the week and, not to put too fine a point on it, it absolutely pissed down. At this time of year we might get a little rain, or more likely, none at all. The torrential rain made news headlines here and there are Youtube sequences showing cars and trucks pushed through towns by the muddy waters. View full article »

My friend Harry Abbott has fished all over the place but one of the most unusual fishing destinations has been the remote jungle rivers of Thailand. He has often told me how interesting his experiences there were, not just from a fishing point of view, but from the point of view of wildlife and culture.

He was digging around in his computer the other day and found a couple of entries from his Thailand diary and sent them over to me. They are fascinating, and  he was kind enough to let me reproduce them here together with some of the photographs he took at the same time.

Take it away Harry…… View full article »