fishydreams

_{This article was published in Fly Fishing and Fly Tying Monthly, December 2024}

Hey! I have some good news for you. You know how you don´t catch as many fish as anyone else? Come on, let´s face it. It´s true! The same is true of me and I understand that this can result in envy and a deep sense of personal worthlessness. You don´t think you´re that bad? Come on! Just look at the rest of the pages in this magazine. Check out the amazing flies everyone else is tying – way better than yours! And then there are the fish everyone else is hauling out – more than you ever catch, way bigger too.

Facing reality is the first essential step to allow you to move forward, believe me, and by admitting to your shortcomings you have already done the hardest part. You are like the new guy at the alcoholic anonymous meeting when everyone sits around in a circle in the community centre. All eyes are on you. They are expecting you to share your personal story. Eventually, after a few false starts, you work up the courage to open up: “hello, my name is Paul. The flies I tie up are all crap and the fish never eat them. Everybody else on the river is cleaning up and all I catch is trees and rocks.”

That wasn´t so hard, was it? Of course you can try and put a positive spin on all of this. The usual tactic is to pretend that you go fishing, not for the purpose of catching fish, but to connect with nature and step away temporarily from the stresses of daily living. Of course none of this is true. People aren´t dumb enough to be duped that easily. That “communing with nature” stuff is all baloney and everybody knows it. 

The happy news I promised though is that it is you, and not those clowns catching all the fish, that is the really smart one. You may not have realised this already, but your situation gives you a privileged opportunity to become deeply immersed in the task of addressing profound philosophical questions. That is because the other, more “successful” fishermen out there are just thinking about the small stuff. The questions they ask are trivial and inconsequential: what pattern should I use? What size? Should I switch from a dry to an emerger? What are the most productive lies on this stretch of water? 

Not you though! Your lack of talent means you don´t need to waste time with any of this. You have so much more time on your hands! You are not distracted by playing and unhooking fish or watching your fly disappear in a swirl or your indicator slide beneath the surface. Instead your mind is free to roam and to grapple with the questions that have taxed the greatest intellects over the centuries. We´re talking about the really deep questions here: “how much dark matter is in the universe?” “Does God truly exist?” “Does life have any purpose?” “What is consciousness?” “why would anyone in their right mind ever contemplate playing golf?”

Feeling better about yourself? I hope so. My own personal limitations have resulted in me deeply reflecting on such matters. I don´t have complete answers to all of those questions (except the golf one) but I´m working on all of them.

And you should be too. The others can consider themselves fly fishermen, but you can justifiably describe yourself as a deep thinker, a visionary philosopher even. So cut yourself a bit of slack. Stop comparing yourself to the guy who regularly catches fish you could only ever dream about. Compare yourself instead with another intellectual heavyweight.

Descartes maybe?